Want a nice smile? Just say “cheese”
i just finished brushing my straight, white, american teeth … and i was reminded of something one of my students asked me not too long ago.
“dan, why do americans have such white teeth?” she asked.
05.28.2004, 7:44 PM · Humor, Observations, School
“Have your good time, Mr. Sadam”
yesterday was my last day of teaching at shanghai university. forever. and, right now, that’s all i have to say about that.
i will leave you with the transcript from a mid-term skit two of my students performed for me monday, five weeks after it was due. no, the dialogue has nothing to do with what the assignment was actually about. yes, the students received very bad grades for their efforts.
but i thought it was fittingly bizarre. enjoy.
where the hell have i been?
in a cave? well, yes. but only part of the time.you know it’s been a long time when you start getting text messages from your students telling you to update your website. so here you go, bonny.
over the past several weeks, i chose to concentrate on money-making ventures — you know, freelance writing and standing next to cars — instead of this website.
03.11.2004, 1:06 AM · Guangxi, Movies, Observations, Photos, School, Sports · Comments (4)
who needs mistletoe and eggnog?
click here for all the party photos.
i also attended a festivus party recently. although i forgot to take photos during the party, my camera got loose to capture some of the aftermath. and it wasn’t pretty. evidently, after the “airing of grievances” and the “feats of strength,” another festivus tradition is getting stupid drunk.
12.28.2003, 7:47 PM · Photos, School · Comments (3)
‘i think we should be slaves’
so my students are giving mid-term presentations now. the topic: any story about something they experienced over national day holiday. basically, my students are a boring lot … and they readily admit it. i heard over and over again how they slept, watched tv, played computer games, surfed the internet and ate “some delicious foods.”
a few students stuck out, though. one in particular. her father is a history professor, so she spent part of her time reading chinese history books that were lying around her house. her presentation was about the fact that she couldn’t trust anything in those books, thanks to the chinese government’s habit of rewriting — or just erasing — messy bits of history.
10.13.2003, 11:33 PM · Observations, Politics, School · Comments (1)
keeping whitie down
my former student was excited to show me his new apartment. well, apartment may not be the best word. a junior, he still lives in a building owned by the university. he still calls it a dorm. but it’s outside campus — barely outside, mind you, but outside nonetheless — and gives him some feeling of independence. “no curfew,” he said to me proudly. no hot water, either, but he’ll take what he can get.
09.11.2003, 12:39 AM · Observations, School · Comments (3)
the name game
this dialogue may or may not have taken place at shanghai university this week:
student: she’s bringing one of her friends to the dinner. cute.
teacher: oh, so you like this girl? the friend.
student: no, that’s her name: cute.
ah yes, another semester, another slew of students with peculiar, yet priceless, english names.
a sampling of this year’s crop (in no particular order): chriss, lichee, viya, luvee, vitamin, even, shiny, bristol, pizzaro, sting, fanny, heero, vanilla, kurapica, luthy, viper, sunshine (a guy), geniala, quasar, spirits, threa, vicient, jeff (a girl), canoe, interne, mercury, fish, amigo, hill west, ice, vassili, stockton, napanee, mealing, castal, shirka, sin, nickel, seifer, ekin, manson, beryl and an inordinate number of girls named mavis and stella.
09.10.2003, 10:47 PM · Humor, School · Comments (11)
back to china, back to school, back to sleep
i’m 80 hours into my second stint in shanghai … and finally coherent enough to sit in front of my iBook without my head bobbing up and down as if sleep was controlling it with a string. i thought i had the jet lag cured when i went to bed at 8:30 monday night and didn’t wake up until 6 o’clock tuesday morning (i have been told that i spoke on the telephone for approximately 25 minutes at some point during the night — the details of the conversation remain a mystery to me), but i was wrong. after only a few hours of shuteye, i woke up at 5 a.m. today, and couldn’t get back to sleep. it’s hard to snooze when your body thinks it’s time for the evening news … and i don’t even watch the evening news. strange.
09.03.2003, 1:07 PM · Observations, School
buddha made of stone
the latest from my student terra, the biggest NBA fan this side of the pacific:
as for the NBA playoffs, spurs finally won the game over mavericks,i believe it can win the final champion and also glad to see that result, because besides jordan and yaoming, i like tim duncan best.he is so calm in the court and never shows off and i can’t help appreciating this kind of property.his nickname is so great,but i don’t know how to say it in english, while in chinese called “shi fo(pronounce like four)” it means a buddha made of stone.
06.01.2003, 7:39 PM · School, Sports · Comments (7)
class notes: dan’s “lesson plans”
Conversational English
Six classes, freshman and sophomore English majors
Third Semester
* Field Day: In response to the students’ campus quarantine, we headed outdoors and played a avriety of games … including American football. One student actually broke her ankle. (Not kidding.)
* Iraq and SARS, SARS and Iraq: Talked a lot about the two main news stories in the world.
* Just talking: After two semesters with me, students seem more comfortable. So, often no lesson plans are necessary. I go into class and ask, “What do you guys want to talk about today?” And the rest of the class is spent talking … which is what a Conversational English class is all about.
* Two days in Shanghai: Students proposed an itinerary for foreigners with only two days to tour Shanghai.
* Anti-war songs: We listened to and talked about the following songs: “War” by Edwin Starr, “I-feel-like-I’m-fixin’-to-die rag” by Country Joe McDonald, “For what it’s worth” by Buffalo Springfield and “Nuclear War” by Yo La Tengo. (I taught my students many words and phrases that I probably shouldn’t have.)
* Second-grade pen pals: Two classes have corresponded by mail with Miss Cornell’s second graders at Shaker Road Elementary School in Albany, New York. I will post some of the letters soon. (Miss Cornell is a fellow Elizabethtown College grad.)
05.26.2003, 12:43 AM · School
sth about SARS
yeah, i didn’t know that sth was an abbreviation for something, either — until i moved to china. it’s just one of the many bits of “english” that chinese students use for years thinking it sounds perfectly natural until a native speaker stops them with “what?” the problem is that most of their english teachers are chinese. and those teachers learned from other chinese english teachers and so on and so on. it’s an insular english community, one that assumes all americans sign e-mails with the salutation “wish you happy every day.” really, my students were perplexed when i told them stuff like that, while cute, doesn’t cut it in the english-speaking world. “we were actually taught that,” one of my students gasped.
anyway, i’ve gotten off topic. i just wanted to share a SARS-related e-mail i received from one of my students. it refers to some stuff i mentioned in my 4.29 blog entitled don’t sneeze at others.
05.22.2003, 11:49 PM · Observations, Politics, School · Comments (3)
my far eastern family
Thanks to SARS, none of my family members will visit me in China this year. Good thing my students at Shanghai University are doing their best to make me feel like I’ve got a family here, too. Here are excerpts from a couple student e-mails I’ve received over the past 24 hours:
“By the way,I once saw you having bread during the break of the class by hands.Well ,it’s not ok to do so because of the fact that SARS has spread in Shanghai now.You’d better wash your hands very very carefully before you have bread or something else.Wish you stay healthy in Shanghai.”
04.19.2003, 7:37 PM · School · Comments (6)
no mom, it wasn’t SARS
People say you haven’t really visited China until you’ve vomited in China. Well, I’ve finally arrived! Not sure if it was the 24-hour stomach flu or just some bad fried rice — maybe it was from doing my taxes — but I found myself either kneeling or sitting (or, sometimes, with the unfortunate need to do both at the same time) most of yesterday and some of today.
04.16.2003, 2:04 AM · Observations, Politics, School · Comments (6)
campus culture
What’s currently blaring through the outdoor PA system here at Shanghai University’s Yan Chang Lu Campus? You guessed it: “Up Where We Belong” by Joe Cocker and Jennifer Warnes. Further proof that it’s currently 1982 here in Shanghai.
In other campus culture news …
One of my students has taken to calling me “bro.”
Another likes to greet me with “How you doin’?,” which he picked up from watching Joey Tribbianni on Friends.
Should I be worried?
03.03.2003, 12:35 PM · School · Comments (3)
md or nba?
My students may know me better than I think.
More than a few of them accused me of canceling classes last Monday so I could stay home and watch the NBA All-Star Game on TV — not so I could go to the hospital and have a doctor check out my bum ankle.
I did go to the hospital. I promise. Of course, before I did, I watched the NBA All-Star Game on TV.
a student makes me smile
This is an e-mail I received from one of my students recently. It made me smile.
Hi Dan!Last week, Iattended an English speaking contest held in Jiaotong University. Even though I didn’t get any prize, I enjoyed the experience. And my topic is about your class. Wanna have a look?
01.08.2003, 9:51 PM · School
what does christmas mean to you?
I asked that question to my students at Shanghai University. Here are some of their unedited responses.
Christmas is an important festival in western countries. Foreigners regard Christmas Day as ceremonious just like that we Chinese regard Spring Festival like New Year’s Day. According to a reliable survey, Christmas became popular with a group of fashionable young people about 30 years ago. But it was not well-known in most normal families. It was thought as a fresh thing. Nowadays, with the development of China and contact between west and east, more and more people know and celebrate this special day in many ways.
12.25.2002, 7:58 AM · School · Comments (2)
here’s to a little morning goo
The roads that lead to Shanghai University’s Baoshan Campus — like most roads in Shanghai — are rugged and rutted, part of the continuous and ubiquitous construction project that is trying to transform the former Paris of the East into the Pearl of the Orient. (I’m not sure what they are building, but I am quite sure that whatever it is will very likely be covered in several layers of neon lighting.)
The bumpy bus ride to Baoshan, which I take three days a week, is like regular Rolfing therapy. For 30 minutes each morning, it’s as though somebody put a quarter in the Earth and made the whole world start vibrating.
09.24.2002, 7:25 AM · Observations, School
